HOPE is the first step.
September 29, 2019 (9/29) my buddy Josh was caught for a 2nd time in a one-month period using again – a relapse after being clean for 6 years. He is what I consider as a “beyond a best friend”. He is married with 2 little kids and that day decided that he was going to give up all hope. I had been helping him out since December, 2018 as he was dealing with some recurring child abuse trauma that he faced when he was a kid as a result of being sent off to a behavior modification school (also known as Troubled Teen Industry) that had resurfaced as he approached his 30thbirthday. I myself am a survivor of child (sexual) abuse and although different than his situation the aftereffects and resurfacing of the trauma are the same. I went public with my story on Oprah in 2010 and launched a foundation to assist those that have been victimized and educate to prevent it from happening to others. My knowledge in this area is quite full and my friend had trusted me with his story and guidance. The foundation’s logo is that of an Orange Heart – representing kindness, positive energy and hope.
On 9/29 when he finally answered my txt and finally let me call him, he told me where he was, and he allowed me to come to him. We sat in each other’s cars for 5.5 hours and I walked him through a better plan, took him to rehab where he would detox, start a program, and go into therapy. That was over a year ago and he is not only sober but thriving with a new perspective on that matter.
I do all kinds of speaking presentations on the subject matter of childhood trauma and that often addiction is the symptom of a bigger issue and that many do not even realize that what happened to them as a child has a profound impact on them later on to the point where drugs and alcohol seem like a better solution. People do not understand how trauma effects the brain long term. My heart breaks for those that have been abused or neglected in some way, by people that didn’t see the worthiness of a child. And THEN they or society discounts them even more when they decide to take drugs to numb out what hurts classifying them as something less than human because they are an addict.
My friend who is also a member of our team of volunteers and I decided we would create and host an event in Riverside, NJ in September (9/26/20) – in honor of overdose awareness/recovery month – with that color being purple and decided to call it “Orange meets Purple”! The event is to bring awareness to the connection of childhood trauma and addiction and let people know that it is okay. That as a child you were a victim at the hands of an adult that should have taken better care of you and that help and recovery is possible. We will tell the full story of that day (almost a year ago) and provide support materials at a breakfast.
Enough is enough with hurting children! Enough is enough with hurt adults thinking whatever happened was their fault compounded with that of a substance addiction. I could have lost my friend and there is not a day that goes by that I am not thankful he is still here and healthy. Married, raising his two children, working hard every day at his job and at the same time helping others! No matter what I will stand by his side and it is a true honor that it will include having him next to me at this event! If you are a victim of childhood trauma, I am happy to talk to you about it!
Editor’s Note: The Orange meets Purple event took place on 9/26/20 and was a great success. My buddy Josh and I were able to tell the story of what happened that day and inspire others to not give up hope knowing that there is a better way. We were also able to provide language to the need to prevent childhood trauma but if in fact it has happened then it is critically important that it be addressed through the recovery process. With just over 50 attendees, we had 3 to 4 addiction recovery agencies handout information of the services that they offer, provided guests with a list of suggested readings, and a list of movies on the subject matter. Some guests received books that were given away as well as an iPad (critical for attending meetings in a COVID/Virtual world). The tag line of this event read as followed “HOPE is the first step” – and nothing could be truer. The Humanity Preservation Foundation will be hosting the 2nd annual “Orange meets Purple” on August 21, 2021.
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